Living Beliefs

A point was made to me the other day, which somewhat changed my mind on the relationship between how we live and how we believe. It used to be the case that I believed that the two were loosely related, but not much stock could be taken into it. After all, we're all sinners, and we all believe we ought to be a saint, and so there is a disconnect, but the relationship between the two isn't all that strong. You wouldn't say, "Well, since you act like a little devil but believe you ought to be an angel, you clearly don't believe it, or else you wouldn't be a diablito." I mean, part of me knew there was a connection. Habits become character, overflow of the heart and all that jazz 

But then it was pointed out to me how much of the Roman Church is in trouble because of the practices. So, for example, a minority of Catholics believe in the Real Presence. This is reflected in the way we handle the host. Instead of treating it with the utmost reverence and care, making sure no particles are dropped, we take communion in the hand, and we allow laymen to distribute the host too often, even though they are meant to be used only in extraordinary circumstances. Do we believe Mass is a little bit of heaven on Earth? Modern architecture sure doesn't seem to reflect that. No glass floors (marble) nor color nor emphasis on the tabernacle all suggest that what we believe is that our own beliefs are not really important. 

I wonder what other aspects of my own personal life reflect this. Perhaps it is difficult for me to see this because I do not pretend that when I do wrong I am doing right. When I do wrong, I admit I am doing wrong. When I have friends who tell me that since I know what I am doing is wrong that I should stop doing that wrong. But I refuse, and declare that I will continue doing what I know is wrong. Unlike the bad shape of the liturgy and architecture, I don't pretend to believe what I say I believe and then say I practice it but then practice as if I do not truly believe it. 

I know I have a disproportionate ratio of mass-confession attendance. That might be telling. 

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