Alexander Pruss



Today was an enlightening day. I met Alexander Pruss, someone I highly admire and respect, and to be honest, am a little intimidated by. I took notes on my phone from his lecture, and I'll copy it here, but do scroll down for my interaction with him during Q&A. 

  • All love has appreciation, good will, and striving for union
  • If I don't appreciate the other, I set myself up superior 
  • If I don't appreciate the other, but desire union, then I am degrading them
  • If I pursue the others good, but don't have appreciation, I am a fan and not a lover 
  • If I don't pursue the other's good, but desire union, I am a creep 
  • If I don't want union, but have appreciation, then do you really appreciate? Do you really love yourself? (oh, I'm not worthy...) 
  • If I don't want union but seek the others good, you demean those who receive your charity 
  • Desiring goods for others doesn't entail providing those goods themselves. Ex: parents who desire sexual goods for their children
  • Romantic love strives towards sexual union 
  • What makes intercourse consummate erotic love? Intercourse is the most thorough way for two people to voluntarily and equally unite. Without equality of persons, there is a kind of lie and disintegration
I asked him the question I raised in a previous post, which is, what happens to love when one lover dies? Pruss responded by saying that we had to keep the form of love in mind, and that since death makes you incorporeal, and romantic loves desires another corporeally, then such love is not possible. I followed up by saying that incorporeality is only momentary and we will have resurrected bodies. He hummed and he hawwed and said that was a difficulty, which was interesting for me to hear. Obviously a very humble guy. He did mention, and I thought this was really interesting, that the Orthodox Christians have something of a process for widows who want to get married again. They have a suspicion about it, and they make the parties go through something of a penance, or prayer. I will look into this. 

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